Bring it on life!

Little did I know that a visit to one of the best hospitals in the world would give me a deeper perspective to life.  Just a few such insights:

• No matter what your/your loved ones’ problems are, there are worse people out there especially in a hospital. 
• Such people also unfortunately include very young children and those young children have the best smiles in the world. Their physical/mental ailments have no bearing on their gorgeous smiles.
• Caregivers of such unwell children also share genuine hearty smiles, suggesting they accept the fact that these children are indeed very special and they experience true joy in taking care of them, despite it being the hardest job on earth.
• There are indeed kind-hearted, extremely  efficient, amazing nurses with nimble fingers that adeptly do the piercing on your little one’s hands, and magically, they are on duty, when it is your turn to be there.
• A test that seems to take forever doesn’t seem that long at all especially when the nurse suggests that you take a nap along side your little one, sets you up a pillow and a warm blanket.  A 9 AM nap is virtually unimaginable, but given the circumstances where there is no laundry to fold, dishes to wash or food to be cooked, thanks to being in a hospital, the only thought that seems to prevail is, “Thank God for what I have at this very moment (although in a hospital)!” 🙂
• All in all, a long day ends with a healthy thought: trying times? Bring it on! I will find the silver lining no matter how trying!!! 🙂

Perception !

Lately I have been thinking a lot about what “disappointment” is. It is more and more evident that disappointment stems from expectations… whether it is people or situations…. We live our lives believing in Theory  – Every action has an equal and opposite reaction. This is statement is absolutely true. However, the twist to this is that perceived reaction and actual reaction are many a time poles apart from one another.  Although a struggle, I now analyze every situation in my life and “try” to understand why certain things happen in a certain way. The answer seems to be so clear…. I can only control what “I” have control over…. I can control my reactions to a situation, not the response of another person involved in the same situation. With this realization, my internal conflict is a lot lesser because I am not spending my time analyzing why another person reacted the way he / she did. This has given me so much more courage. And then I wonder about all those moments in life when I have brooded and cried over people who have either hurt me or walked away from me. If only I had this understanding of life then…..

Yet another realization is how I am perceived…. I am perceived a certain way through my interactions with people. There is perhaps a lot of truth to that perception, however, is that “perceived me” really the “real me”??? Its an interesting question. I do realize that there is a link lost between the two on many occasions. There used to be a time when it bothered me when someone said “I didn’t expect this of you”. A statement like that comes from the other person’s perception of me. In the past, I have tried really hard to “live up to expectations”. But now I have reached a stage where I am able to stand up and say “You know what. Am sorry you didn’t expect it of me. But it is what it is”. I am not making this statement in arrogance. I am saying… I am conscious of my actions and words. Should they cause unintentional harm, I am sorry because the truth is that the harm is truly un-intentional. However, that does not mean  I am willing to change because another person “expects” me to change. Fundamentally I believe that change has to come from within. External factors may contribute to internal change, but if change is forced, then the outcome is often not so desirable…..

Bottom line : Go figure.. No idea…. Am still trying to figure it out too !!! 🙂